The story
of Joseph is remarkable on several fronts, not the least of which is Joseph’s magnanimity
towards his brothers and the sense of peace that Joseph developed after his
years of struggle.
Today’s
reading begins with Joseph overcome with emotion and eager to reveal himself to
his brothers. His previous reluctance to
trust his brothers until they had produced Benjamin and demonstrated their
concern for their father and their repentance is more understandable. When people hurt us, we want them to prove
themselves, too. Very often, though, our
broken relationships end just short of full reconciliation. We move closer to one another; we might
demand and even get some sense of repentance out of the one who hurt us; but it
is really hard to embrace that person fully again. “Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice,
shame on me,” seems to be our motto. Yet,
Joseph is not like his father, who was ‘reconciled’ to his brother Esau and
promptly settled down someplace else, far from Esau (Genesis 33:16-17). He wants his brothers taken care of and near.
I think
many of us could wish for such an attitude, such an ability to forgive. Joseph developed that attitude over the
course of some 20 years, and over those years he had had a chance to grow in
wisdom. That wisdom—one of the other
remarkable parts of this story—was that he had had a chance to look back over
his life and see the ways that the Lord had been directing him and grooming him
and preparing him for the moment when he would be the one who would rescue his
family from jeopardy. Again, that wisdom
seems to be a rare gift and very often we might find ourselves wishing that we
could make sense of our lives. Of
course, again, Joseph only understood these things in hindsight. I doubt he was feeling very optimistic as he
was walking down to Egypt the first time or as he was languishing in
prison. But looking back, he could see
the Lord developing in him the skills and attitudes necessary for his current
position.
It seems to
me that these two things—the wisdom to see what the Lord is up to and the
ability to forgive—go hand in hand. The
insight that God had worked all things out for the good of the whole family
surely made it easier to forgive his brothers and the reconciliation with his
brothers capped the sense of purpose that Joseph felt. That’s the case for us, too. Our ability to forgive those who have hurt us
is coupled with our maturing ability to discern how good may have come out of
evil. Sometimes that good is simply the
realization that pain and hurt have made us more sensitive to the pain we have
caused others and the determination not to cause it in the future. When we absolutely refuse to grow through
pain and hurt, forgiveness remains a challenge to grant. And conversely, refusing to contemplate
forgiveness hinders our ability to grow into maturity.
Would that
the Lord would bless each of us as he blessed Joseph. Not with power and enormous influence, but
with the wisdom to see his hand guiding and shaping us in the difficult periods
of life and with the ability to let go of old hurts!
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