Forgive Us Our Trespasses . . .

 “Forgive Us Our Sins . . .”

A Sermon for the 12th Sunday after Pentecost

A. D. 2012

A Challenging Prayer

            When I first introduced this series on the Lord’s Prayer, I mentioned a woman in my vicarage congregation who told me that she didn’t pray the 5^th Petition—at least not 2^nd clause.  It was a long time ago, but if I recall the conversation correctly, it wasn’t that she was nursing some long-standing grudges; it was more along the lines of “why take a chance?”  She apparently noticed something that a lot of people notice:  the 5^th Petition seems to make our being forgiven dependent on our granting forgiveness—and she just was sure she was doing that consistently.

            Here’s the reality:  this petition is very familiar, but it’s very difficult, too.  There are difficulties of translation:  I found myself in Greek grammar books I rarely look at anymore trying to figure out a grammatical problem.  And, there are difficulties of meaning.  Today, let’s take a look at the challenges this petition offers and try to find at least a little insight into what exactly we are praying for here.

The First Clause

            My own difficulty comes in a place that most people probably find relatively easy, and that’s because my struggle is in the first clause.  What does it mean to pray for forgiveness?  Perhaps I’ve just been exposed to too much bad theology in junior high confirmation classes over the years.  Whenever I would ask the question about how God grants forgiveness, I would too often get this answer, “God forgives me when I pray.” Or, worse, “God forgives because I ask for it.”  Both are frankly false.  The first is false because there is no promise of forgiveness attached to the practice of prayer—not like there is for Baptism or Lord’s Supper.  The second is just outright works-righteousness.

            So, here’s the truth:  God forgave your sins when and because Jesus died for you.  Forgiveness comes on no other occasion and for no other reason!  And God distributes that forgiveness, dispenses it, and delivers it through the means of grace.  He distributes forgiveness in the fact of your Baptism and in the faithful reception of the Body and Blood of Jesus in the Lord’s Supper.  He distributes it when His Word of forgiveness is declared, that is, in the act of Absolution, and whenever the Word declares to you what Jesus has done for you.

            This seems perfectly clear to me, but it’s a matter of confusion for a lot of people.

            Let’s be clear.  It is not a bad thing to pray for forgiveness; for goodness’ sake, Jesus tells us to!  But let’s not get cause and effect involved:  that somehow our prayers are the reason for or the instrument of forgiveness.

            But, if prayer is not a cause or an instrument of our forgiveness, then why should we pray for forgiveness?  Let me suggest two reasons.

            First, we pray for forgiveness because we are so aware of our constant need for forgiveness.  That is to say, our frailty, our weakness, and our failings all call out of us a longing for forgiveness.  The Small Catechism puts it this way, “For we daily sin much and deserve nothing but punishment . . but we pray that God would not look at our sins or deny our prayers because of them.”  In this way, we ought to see our prayer for forgiveness as an act of repentance.  In Lutheran theology, repentance is not faith or forgiveness; it is contrition, brokenness and sorrow over our sin.  To be sure, the Gospel must be applied immediately to the repentant.  Repentance belongs together with faith created and sustained by God’s own words of forgiveness.  In terms of our personal prayers, we may find ourselves ‘preaching the Gospel’ to ourselves, saying, even as we utter a prayer for forgiveness, “Nevertheless, I am baptized; I know what my God has done for me in His Son, Jesus.”  But it is the Gospel so proclaimed that delivers forgiveness—not our act of praying.

            A second reason we pray this petition is because we struggle so much to accept the reality of forgiveness.  I have this one specific memory of 3^rd or 4^th grade.  I broke a rule during an inside recess at school and I got caught.  The ridiculous thing is that this was over 30 years ago, and still I kick myself for being so stupid.  It’s just an example of the way our sins stick to us.  God might say that He has removed our sins as far as the east is from the west (Ps. 103), but we wonder how He could possibly forget something that we so clearly remember.

            Jesus teaches us to pray for the certainty and the comfort that comes from a faith that truly believes its debts are paid, its sins are forgiven.

The Second Clause

            Those are my struggles with this petition, but I suspect more of us share the struggles of the lady in my vicarage congregation.  I mean, the second part of the petition sure seems to make our being forgiven dependent on granting forgiveness.  An important clarification notes that Jesus gives this prayer to those who are already His disciples in both Matthew and Luke.  It is a prayer that presupposes one has received the forgiveness of God given freely through Jesus.  Therefore, our forgiving is no condition of our being forgiven.

            However, we should take today’s Gospel reading from Matthew 18 into account:  Those who have received the free gift of forgiveness are also expected to grant forgiveness, and the steadfast refusal to grant forgiveness is a danger to faith.  Steadfast refusal to grant forgiveness means a failure to connect with the forgiveness the Lord has offered; it means that one is returning the heart of flesh the Lord gives and hardening one’s heart again into a heart of stone (Ezek. 36).   Ultimately, steadfast refusal to forgive leads to the rejection of the Lord’s own forgiveness and the withdrawal of that forgiveness.

            So, our granting forgiveness does not cause our being forgiven, but our refusing to grant forgiveness can be an indication that we are rejecting the Lord’s forgiveness.

            Many find that last point troubling and wonder if they are in danger of losing forgiveness because of their own incomplete granting of forgiveness.  Here are three lessons that will ease that concern.

            First, we should understand that forgiveness is in our power to give.  It does not depend in any way on the one who requires our forgiveness.  It is possible to forgive a person who is completely unrepentant.  This is so because forgiveness means letting go of our rights against another person. It means choosing not to take revenge, not to hold a grudge, not to demand our rights for retribution, not to repay evil for evil.  A synonym of forgive is release, and in forgiving, we release the other from our vengeance and we release ourselves from our bitterness.  A steadfast refusal to forgive means that both offended and offender are still captive to the other.  Release means your freedom and theirs.

            Certainly this is a matter for our prayers.  Sometimes we feel so bound by the sins committed against us that completely lose sight of fact that forgiveness is ours to give, regardless of other person.  And the longing for the ability to release those hurts so long clutched in our hands is a thing we hold up to the Lord’s care.

            Second, we should learn that there is an important difference between struggling to forgive and refusing to forgive.  Some wounds are so grievous that they don’t heal all at once; some are so deep that they mark us with pain throughout our lives.  In the midst of that pain, it is a difficult thing to release the one who caused that pain from the threat of punishment.  Sometimes it takes months and years.  But the fact that some wounds continue to hurt and that they are hard to let go of completely is not the same thing as refusing to let go.  Part of this prayer is a prayer that the Lord would help us let go of those grudges completely.

            Finally, we should not the difference between forgiveness and reconciliation.  Forgiveness is unilateral; reconciliation needs two parties. Sometimes we can let go of the hurt and the desire for revenge and repayment.  But sometimes we also have to acknowledge that things can’t go back to the way they were before, especially if no similar change in offender.  If a friend betrays my trust, I can let the pain go, but I might not want to be friend anymore, at least not as close as once were.  If a spouse betrays a spouse, the wounded party may truly release that debt, but sometimes the marriage can’t be restored, if the breach is too deep and the offender can’t be trusted not to do it again.

            Again this distinction is part of our prayer.  Losing a dear relationship means grief over what is no more, and we pray that we may adapt to that circumstance and deal with that grief.  Sometimes we would really desire to have a relationship fully restored but the other’s recalcitrance stands in the way. In such a case, our prayer is also that the offender would come to a repentance that allows full restoration between us.

            In summary, it is a challenging petition.  It challenges us to focus with laser-like intensity on source of our forgiveness, Jesus.  It challenges us to take seriously the free gift of forgiveness, not doubting it.  It challenges us to become a forgiving people, with all the struggles that might mean as we strive to become more like our gracious God in releasing the debts owed to us and working diligently to become a people at peace with one another and those around us.  It is a challenging petition, but it is an incredibly practical one that touches some of the most sensitive realities of our lives.